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Azra Bashir spoke by phone to
her son Usman, holed up in a
freezing border outpost on the
dangerous Afghanistan-Pakistan
border, only hours before NATO
airstrikes killed him and 23 other
Pakistani soldiers. The 23 year-
old captain told his mother not
to worry about him, and
reminded her to watch her
health.As Pakistan and the
United States argue about the
sequence of events that led to
the attacks, Bashir is struggling
with the pain of losing a child.
Her anger, and that of other
relatives mourning loved ones
killed by a nominal ally, helps
explain the uncompromising
stance Islamabad has struck
toward Washington since the
incident."I want to tell our
soldiers that they should avenge
the killing of Usman and other
soldiers like him," Bashir said in
an interview in her home in
Punjab province. As she spoke,
she kissed a framed photo of
her son, who also left behind a
wife and 2-month-old
daughter.Bashir's call for
revenge has been echoed in
daily protests held in Pakistan's
major cities, many of them
organized by Islamist and right-
wing parties who have long said
that America and NATO — not
the Taliban — are the prime
enemies of Pakistan.The border
incident has greatly
strengthened that narrative,
reducing the political space for
those who argue that
cooperation with Washington is
in the country's interest. The
army, which has received
billions of dollars in U.S. aid since
2001 in exchange for its
cooperation, however limited,
against militants, has fueled the
hard line by accusing NATO of a
"deliberate act of
aggression."The 24 deaths by
apparent American friendly fire
come on top of the 3,000
Pakistani security force
members who have been killed
over the last 10 years fighting
insurgents, mainly in the
northwest close to the Afghan
border.Many in the country,
including leading politicians, say
the war has been foisted upon
them by America. They say the
violence would end if Islamabad
severed its ties with
Washington."How long will we
sacrifice our youths, our soldiers
for others?" said Capt. Usman
Bashir's father, Bashir Ahmed.
"This is not our war. This is their
war."American and NATO
officials have expressed
sympathy over the deaths,
saying the incident was a
mistake and is being
investigated. The border area is
infested with militants, whom
NATO has long complained
receive safe haven on the
Pakistan side to launch attacks
in Afghanistan."What kind of
mistake is this that kills innocent
poor people?" asked Asfandyar
Khan, who lost his 22-year-old
son in the attacks. "We don't
want your investigation and
inquires. I want justice. I want
real action against those
responsible."He fought back
tears as he spoke, sitting feet
away from the freshly dug
grave holding his son, Najibullah
Khan.The grave in the family's
village of Kabuli Kili in
northwest Khyber Pakhtunkhwa
was covered in wreaths of
flowers donated by military
officials. A green and white
Pakistani flag flew from a
bamboo pole nearby."You are
calling us friends," Khan said of
the United States. "Is this the
way you people treat friends? If
this is friendship, we have had
enough, and don't want such
friendship."Pakistan has
retaliated for the incident by
closing its Afghan border
crossings to NATO supplies, by
demanding the U.S. vacate an air
base used by American drones
attacking militants along the
frontier, and by boycotting an
international conference in
Germany aimed at stabilizing
Afghanistan.Washington is keen
to repair damage done to the
relationship. It wants to get the
supplies moving again, and also
sees Islamabad's links with
Afghan insurgent leaders on its
soil as a key asset in negotiating
a peace deal in Afghanistan
which will allow the U.S. to
withdraw its combat troops by
the scheduled 2014
deadline.Pakistan relies heavily
on American aid, and it too
wants to avoid a rupture in
ties.The U.S. and Pakistan have
long had a troubled relationship,
thanks to Pakistan's reluctance
to target Afghan Taliban
fighters and their allies using
Pakistani territory to attack
American troops in Afghanistan.
Islamabad is believed to see
those insurgents as useful
proxies in Afghanistan, once the
U.S. withdraws.The NATO attack
was the latest in a series of
crises to beset the relationship
this year.In January, an
American CIA contractor shot
two Pakistani men who he said
tried to rob him, sparking
outrage. The May 2 unilateral
raid that killed Osama bin Laden
was also portrayed as a gross
violation of Pakistan's
sovereignty, largely drowning
out questions over how the al-
Qaida chief was living
undetected in an army town for
five years.Most experts believe
the two countries will patch
things up this time, and that the
border closure will be
temporary, chiefly because
Washington and Islamabad still
need each other. But the
Pakistani reaction since the
strikes has betrayed the lack of
trust at the heart of the
relationship, and bodes ill for
meaningful Western
cooperation with Pakistan over
ending the Afghan war."The
time has come for 180 million
Pakistanis to choose between a
life of respect or ignominy," said
Shahbaz Sharif, the head of the
ruling party in Punjab after
visiting Bashir's family this
week. "American foreign aid is
drenched in the blood of
martyrs and we will have to
give it up and get back up on
our own feet," he was quoted
by local media reports as saying.